


Crisis of Faith

by benoitblanc



Category: Knives Out (2019)
Genre: F/M, Mentions of Harlan's death, Some Fluff, Some angst, Spent a while on this rip, also posted on Tumblr
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-16
Updated: 2019-12-16
Packaged: 2021-02-26 01:27:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,231
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21825124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/benoitblanc/pseuds/benoitblanc
Summary: Y/N is a Thrombey, a Thrombey who was at that awful party that would tear her family apart. But she was also the assistant to Private Investigator, Benoit Blanc - Whom she happened to have more than platonic feelings towards. Her decisions are pretty slim.
Relationships: Benoit Blanc/Reader, Benoit Blanc/Thrombey Reader
Comments: 2
Kudos: 79





	Crisis of Faith

**Author's Note:**

> As mentioned in the tags, Harlan's death is mentioned, that means that there will be mentions to suicide. There's also mentions of murder as well as Marta's legality as an American citizen since it came up in the movie !

Unlike someone close in age to her, Y/N had aspirations and goals of being something more for herself rather than being a trust fund playboy like Ransom Drysdale.Y/N had grown up with the Thrombey’s, she wasn’t related to them by blood but when her parents knew they couldn’t raise a child they dropped her off with her Godparents, which just happened to be the Thrombey family, because they knew that if anyone had the resources to take care of a child - it would be them.

They had hope for the young five-year-old girl when they first took her in, and they had even more hope for her when she announced that she was going to be attending university. Of course, despite being rich, they weren’t unintelligent people, they had her spend two years at community college first so she could figure out what she really wanted before they spent their money on a university. Y/N was pursuing criminology, and that’s how she ended up being an assistant investigator to Benoit Blanc. It was all pretty simple working alongside him until she realized that she had nothing short of a giant crush on the man who was about twenty years her senior. 

Truth be told, she doesn’t show it. No one, not even he, has figured out that there’s something more going on in her head when she looks at him. No one but Meg, who happened to be the one who listens to her late-night ramblings about how much she likes her superior officer. This is what makes being stuck between her job, her crush, and her family such a difficult thing for her.

“You know I didn’t do it, Benoit.” Y/N muttered this was the first time the two of them had gotten a chance to speak privately. “I know, but they’re going to accuse me of giving you special treatment if I automatically rule you out just because we’re partners.” That’s it, partners. Not romantic partners, partners in solving a crime. “The one time I take the entire night off and this is what happens in my home,” She comments, a laugh laced in her voice. 

Despite being her closest friend, Benoit had never been to the Thrombey home. So bringing him back to the place that she grew up and currently lived in felt personal. Despite this, she wished it had been under better circumstances. “Are you okay?” Benoit asked, and she knew that he’d know if she lied to him. Y/N’s eyes moved up to meet his, even when sitting he somehow managed to tower over her.

. “No, Harlan treated me like his daughter and I didn’t even get to say goodbye to him. I can’t say that I feel fantastic.” She said, letting her guard down about how she actually felt for the first time since it happened. She could feel tears trying to spill out, but she attempted to keep them from doing so.

She didn’t expect to feel Benoit wrap an arm around her neck and pull her into him, nor did she expect her head to naturally rest on top of his chest as if they’d done this before. “Just let it out,” He said gently, and for the first time, she let the sobs come through. She wanted to stay strong in front of her adoptive family, mainly because most of them were absolute assholes who didn’t deserve to see her true feelings, but now that it was just her and Benoit she knew that she didn’t have to contain herself.

After a few moments, Y/N pulled back and wiped her eyes, sniffing and wiping her mouth as well to make sure nothing was there. She was sure her eyes were puffy and bloodshot, which is why she was afraid to look at Benoit. “Take a break, I’ve interviewed everyone in the house.” He informed her and she nodded, finally turning to glance at him. “Are you sure you can stay here tonight?” He questioned, and she knew that he was asking just because he was her closest friend, but she couldn’t contain the part of her that wished it was something more. “Aren’t you staying?” She questioned, she’d known him for a while and she happened to know his methods when he suspected foul play. “For a bit, I have to sleep you know I’m not a vampire.” He said, teasing her which put a small smile on Y/N’s face. “Alright, you’re right. I probably can’t stay here tonight but I have nowhere else to go.” Y/N said, trailing off. 

“You can stay with me if you need to. I’ll be here until ten.” Benoit told her, and she nodded, not allowing herself to show that she wanted it to be something more than him just not wanting her to feel completely haunted by what had happened in the house that she would be sleeping in; at least that’s why she was sure that’s why he was offering. “I’ll go with you, I probably won’t be able to sleep in this house. I haven’t been sleeping much at all this past week.” She explained, and he raised an eyebrow. “I can tell,” He said. Benoit slowly got up, offering his partner a hand up as well. 

The rest of the day was nothing short of sluggish, everyone in the house was miserable and half of the people there seemed to be convinced that Y/N could stop the investigation because she was close to Benoit. The only person that hadn’t been harassing her about using her ‘influence’ to end the investigation had been Meg who happened to know that her feelings for her close friend and co-worker were more than platonic. “Listen, Y/N,” Joni started sitting beside you on one side and Walt joining in on the other side of you on the couch. “I know he’s a bit older than you, but maybe if you just sleep with him for the good of the-” “Jesus fucking Christ Joni, she’s not a prostitute!” Walt said, clearly not on board with what he sat down to discuss. “I’m just saying that us women-” “I think you should drop it, mom,” Meg said, finally speaking up from her side of the room. “You’re clearly making Y/N uncomfortable and that’s no way to treat a family member,” Meg said comfortingly. 

At 9:50 on the dot Y/N claimed that she was going to be staying at a hotel for the night and walked out onto the deck with a bag packed to meet Benoit. “You’re early,” He commented and she turned to face him. “Yeah, thought it would be better than being late.” She noted. After this, they both got in his car and went on their way to Benoit’s house. It would be a lie to say that she’d never stayed at his home, she had, late night’s working a case, but it had always been business and never personal.

But she didn’t have much time to think about it since from the moment she sat in the car, Y/N was fast asleep. Generally, she would never sleep in a car. But given the circumstances, she was exhausted and could barely keep her eyes open. She only woke long enough later to get herself into the house before passing out on the couch. She would have gone to the spare bedroom but she was just too tired, and Benoit was too polite to wake her from her slumber so she didn’t bother carrying her. 

When Y/N woke she was an entire mess, her clothing hadn't changed all night and her hair was matted, but thankfully she brought things that could fix that. She got dressed, brushed her hair, and brushed her teeth before shoving all of that stuff back in her bag and sitting down on the couch. “Come on, we should be going,” Benoit said from the kitchen, causing her to jump a bit. “H-How long have you been in there?” She questioned and he shrugged in response, moving to the coat rack to put his coat on. “A while, figured it was best not to wake you unless we really had to leave.” He said, and the ride there was rather silent. 

Not awkwardly silent, but still silent. She didn’t know if it was wise to come into the house with him since she had claimed that she was going to be staying at a hotel, but it was too late for her to really question that as they walked in. The will reading was something she was dreading, but not because she was hoping that she was in it. Y/N had specifically asked not to be left in Harlan’s will because she knew how the rest of the family would react, and he knew she was right. She was horrified for the will reading because of how the family acted. 

She waited inside and sat next to Walt, who had been like a brother to her, but she knew that the attitude in the room was going to change shortly after. When she heard dogs barking and a loud car pull into their driveway she knew that Ransom was home. Y/N had never been overly fond of Ransom, she had always seen him to be somewhat of an ass, but she had never hated the man by any means. However, she knew that a storm of shit was about to roll in the moment he walked through those doors, and the moment that he annoyed her co-workers, so she was quick to walk out before the drama could unfold. She stood with Marta and Benoit instead. “Shouldn’t you be in there with your family?” Marta asked, looking at Y/N. She shook her head, “You hear them, I don’t want any part of it.” 

The will reading was dramatic, but Y/N seemed to be one of the only members of the family that wasn’t surprised by what had happened. She wasn’t surprised that Marta had gotten everything, and she had already knew that she wasn’t going to be in the will because she had asked not to be. But that didn’t mean that Y/N wanted to stick around the Thrombey house while they verbally assaulted poor Marta. 

So, while the members of her family attacked Marta, Y/N got into her car and drove away, she didn’t stick around long enough to see their reactions to realizing that she had left. She ended up going to the police station, the place where she used to intern before she started working as Benoit’s assistant. She knew that they’d be returning soon, so she waited for them to do so. It was probably within the next five or six minutes that Benoit and the others walked in.

“They’re all pretty pissed at you, you know.” Detective Elliot said as he walked in, setting his coat on the back of his desk chair. “Are they? Let them be pissed, they’re going to be pissed all night.” She responded. “Why’d you come here?”questioned Trooper Wagner as he looked at Y/N. “I had nowhere else to go and I didn’t really feel like staying there.” She responded honestly. 

“Well I’m about to go, do you want to come?” Benoit asked, drawing her attention away from the two men. “Yeah.” She said, getting up and sending a smile and a ‘goodbye’ to the two police officers before following Benoit out. “Would I be presumptuous to assume that you want to stay at my house again?” He questioned once they got to his car. “You would be, yes. But you’d be wrong. I don’t want to be with them tonight, but I have to be, I have no idea what they’d do tonight and I have to make sure they don’t do anything bad.” She responded

“So, you’re going back home now, then?” Benoit questioned and she shook her head. “I mean, I can. But I’d rather get some dinner first.” She responded, somewhat teasingly, as she got into the passenger seat of the car, Benoit following and getting into the driver’s side. “Alright, okay we can get food.” He said, putting his seat buckle on and waiting for her to do the same. It didn’t take long for her to get the memo and buckle herself in. 

The drive to a local diner was short-lived, but she couldn’t say she would like it if she had a long car ride in which neither of them spoke a word to the other. It wasn’t particularly awkward, but every moment she had the urge to say something but subsequently decided that she was too nervous - thus resulting in a silent ten minute car ride to the diner. The moment the car was off they made their way into the diner and found a seat, ordering drinks and food and still saying nothing before they were finally left to their own devices to wait for the food.

“Without sounding forward, are you sure you’re okay staying with them?” Benoit questioned, breaking the streak of silence that had befallen the two. Y/N glanced up at him and nodded, “Suppose I am, they’re greedy and over dramatic but they’re still my family.” She explained, and Benoit nodded as though he understood why she would feel that way, but he really couldn’t understand why she would feel any sort of attachment to the Thrombey family. 

“You’re going to come back to the house tomorrow though, right?” Y/N questioned, and for the first time she realized how odd this was. She wasn’t allowed on the investigation because it was so personal to her, she was so used to knowing everything about Benoit’s cases and even helping him solve some of them, although he seemed to figure most of them out on his own rather quickly, and now she was utterly clueless to whether he was even planning on showing up to their home the next day for further investigation. 

“I intended on it, not sure how tomorrow’s going to play out though.” He responded and she nodded, but she didn’t particularly know what he meant. Y/N studied him, watched him more than she would be proud to admit, and she’d picked up a good portion of Benoit’s mannerisms. He knew something about the case that he wasn’t sharing with her, she had no idea what it was that he knew but she had known him for long enough that she knew that there was something that he knew and was hiding from her judging by his response to her question. 

She knew that he couldn’t tell her what it was, but she wished that he could. Before she could say anything, the waitress brought the food ordered to the table and left quickly - she seemed to be in a pretty big rush. “When this case is over, what will you do?” Benoit asked, but for once in her recent life, Y/N Thrombey didn’t have an answer. “I don’t know,” She said, honestly, as she looked at her food. “We won’t have the house anymore, I work with you for free and I don’t intend on… not working with you.” She trailed off, and she felt her heart rate picking up. She hadn’t considered the fact that losing her inheritance meant losing the life that she had. 

“You can stay with me, you know.” He said, drawing her away from her thoughts. “Really?” She asked, and he nodded. “I’ve let you stay with me these past few days, haven’t I?” He asked and she nodded, slowly. “Right, why wouldn’t I let you stay with me indefinitely then?” He asked, he had a point but at the same time he had absolutely no point - but she wasn’t about to tell him that. 

She wanted to say yes, but she also didn’t know particularly how she would have felt about living with someone that she clearly had feelings for - someone that she had enough trouble hiding said feelings from for a few hours out of the day. But it wasn’t like she really had much of a choice in the matter

“I mean- Yes, if you’ll have me.” She stammered out. Which seemed to satisfy him enough for an answer, and by the time they had finished with lunch she was less than excited to return home. She knew how her family was going to act, that they might ask her to do something that might harm Marta, but she also knew that she had to return to her home. So, they drove back to the mansion, making sure to part a bit away so no one bombarded Benoit for driving near their home during such a time of crisis. 

“I have to ask again - are you sure you want to go back?” He questioned noting the nervous expression on Y/N’s face. “I don’t want to, I have to. As awful as they can be they’re still my family.” She said, a sigh leaving her throat. He didn’t understand, but he wasn’t going to tell her that. “Good luck.” Benoit retorted, and a smile covered her face as she nodded before opening the door and stepping out of the car. “Thank you.” She said, simply, before walking towards her home. Y/N was nervous, she was nervous for multiple reasons, but she felt like she might be okay.

“Y/N! Y/N you’re here!” You heard Joni yell as you walked into the house. “I-” “You’ve got to talk some sense into these people, listen Y/N. I’m an influencer, you can influence them to change-” “Influence who, Joni? Who’s mind? About what?” She questioned as she brushed past her and walked into the family room. “The police, they can’t keep investigating us. We didn’t kill Harlan.” She explained as she sat beside Y/N once she sat down on the couch.

Y/N rolled her eyes, turning to Joni. “You know I work for ‘them’ right?” She questioned, irritation obvious in her voice. “Right, you work for them, so they trust you opinions.” Morris said, drawing your attention across the table towards him. “They trust my opinions, yes. But I’m an assistant to a private investigator, I’m not even a-” “Right, that guy, you work for him. Why don’t you just influence him then.” Walt said from the other side of the couch. “How? What do you want me to do? Fuck him? I’m not a fucking chess piece, I’m a part of this family whether you want me to be or not.” Y/N said, standing and walking towards the entryway. “I can come when I didn’t have to only to be treated like a god damned outsider.” Y/N said, finalizing her words as she walked up to the room she had usually slept in - her room. 

As Y/N plopped down on her bed, laying her head against the pillow as she looked outside of the window and the cloudy, gloomy day - she began to feel like everything that was going on was just some sick joke. She was tired of feeling stressed out all the time about something that she knew that she didn’t do. Y/N fell asleep, honestly, maybe it was the fact that she had barely been sleeping since the dead of Harlan, but when she woke up it was the middle of the night and she woke to the sound of her phone ringing.   
It was Meg. Y/N answered, bringing the phone closer to her face, “Meg? W-” She was cut off by Meg’s, somewhat frantic, voice, “Are you still in the house? Come to my room.” She sounded upset, and Y/N wasn’t going to say no to her. “I’ll be right there.” Y/N said as she hung up the phone, slipping it into her jacket pocket and heading into Meg’s room, not before shutting and locking her door incase this was the family's way of finding something that might help them out in her room. 

Y/N strolled down the hallway, opening Meg’s door and walking in before shutting it behind her, as it was when she had walked in. “What’s wrong?” She asked, sitting down on the bed, opposite of Meg - who seemed incredibly distraught. “I told them about Marta, I told them she’s illegal and I didn’t mean to.” Meg said, her voice was shaking and so was she. “Meg-” “They’re going to use it against her, Marta’s going to go to jail because of me.” She cut Y/N off again. “Calm down- why do you think Marta’s going to go to jail?” You questioned, wondering if Meg knew something that you didn’t. “They’re going to blame her and the court will probably charge her since she’s here illegally.” She said, sniffling.

It took a while, but Y/N managed to calm Meg down enough to get her to fall asleep and Y/N fell asleep on the side chair pretty soon after. 

Similarly to how she had woken up, Y/N heard her phone going off from the pocket in the side of her jacket. Y/N took the phone out of her jacket, this time seeing the phone lighting up to show that Benoit was calling her. She glanced towards Meg before walking out into the hallway, shutting the door behind her and answering the phone as she walked to her room. “What is it?” She questioned, trying to keep the sleep out of her voice but she had just woken up. “Someone burned the police station- you have to come here.” He said, somewhat urgently. “Okay- I’ll be there soon.” She responded, ending the call and quickly changing into some fresh clothes before rushing down the stairs.

“Where are you going?” She heard someone call, she turned to look only to see Walt. “I’ll be back soon, it doesn’t matter.” She said as she rushed out to where she had left her car, getting into it and driving down to the police station. You pulled off close to it, walking towards where you could see your friends, “How did this happen?” You questioned, catching their attention. “Someone burned it down I...know this is a question you might not like but could it have been someone from your family?” Benoit answered, posing the question that she should have known he was going to ask. “I don’t know, I was sleeping all night-” “Is there anyone that wasn’t at the house last night? That you know of.” He cut her off, she sighed and shrugged. “Marta, but she doesn’t live there. Ransom wasn’t there either but he’s never home.” She said, but she couldn’t have known for a fact, she wasn’t awake. “Did you talk to any of them?” He questioned. “Last night I only saw Meg.” She answered, and it was all she could have answered, it was all she knew, and he seemed to believe her.

But as soon as she’d gotten there, everything got even more chaotic when they saw a car she was, essentially, frantically pushed in the back of a police car. Of course, the car would turn out to be Marta and Ransom’s car, and when they finally reached them Y/N ended up in a car with Marta and Benoit - meaning she was the only one clueless about what had happened to Harlan but she didn’t know that.

Marta going into that creepy, abandoned looking building was somewhat suspicious to Y/N, she wanted to question it, but Benoit shot her down - that was when she started to suspect that he knew something that she didn’t, but she had agreed that she wasn’t really a part of the case, hadn’t she. 

“Is Ransom going to be let out?” Y/N questioned from the back, still finding it somewhat odd that he was the only perpetrator, especially since he hadn’t been there the night of the party - or the time when Harlan died. Something wasn’t making sense to her, not that she ever really liked Ransom, and she didn’t really think it would be a loss to the world if he spent some time in a jail cell where everything wouldn’t be handed to him on a silver platter. “Maybe, I-” She could hear the sound of a text message coming through - watched him analyze it, accept it, and turn back to her, only for a moment. “Just wait a little while longer, everything will make sense then.” She didn’t understand, but she didn’t pry.

She tried to sit quietly, waiting for Marta to come back out to the car, but she could help but try to hold back a laugh at the grown-ass man in front of her who was loudly dancing and singing to the music playing in his years. That was, until an ambulance pulled in behind the car.

Everything happened rather quickly, the ambulance taking someone that Y/N couldn’t see, she’d later learn it was Fran, into it. Marta starting to drive again and ultimately confessing that it was her who had killed Harlan, and then claiming that she was going to tell the family face to face what she’d done. Through it all, however, Y/N remained silent. She didn’t know what to do, it sounded like it was a mistake, it surely was a mistake that she’d told Ransom who had always been incredibly untrustworthy. But yet, she felt frozen and she fell silent. Harlan had raised Y/N like she was his own child, and Y/N had trusted him with her life, and she was in the same car as the person that had just admitted to killing him.

She didn’t speak for the entire car ride, but she knew that her mind wasn’t in the right place for her to be able to say anything or even process anything. When the car stopped she was moments from stepping into the car before she was stopped, the feeling of a hand tugging on her wrist pulling her to turn back to look at Benoit. “Are you okay?” He questioned, and she shook her head, but didn’t wish to elaborate on it. “You’re going to have to stay in the dining room while she shows me where what she’s looking for is so they don’t accuse you of knowing beforehand.” Benoit explained, Y/N nodded and went on her way into the dining room, drawing the judgemental stares of some of her family members as she sat down on the couch.

Y/N felt nervous for Marta, despite feeling like some part of her should resent her, she knew Marta was one of the only people that ever actually cared about Harlan, she knew it was an accident, and she knew that Marta didn’t deserve to be punished so terribly over something that could have happened to anyone. So, Y/N sat on the couch, just hoping for something to change, and when she was pulled away and everyone (except for Ransom) was asked to leave Y/N hoped that something had changed.   
Y/N stood outside, and it was the one time that she truly realized that this wasn’t her family anymore. Meg was a friend, yes, but these had been through hell because of her line of work - because of the person she would rather not admit she was in love with, over Marta, who she considered a friend. She had refused to help them, and the looks on their faces made it clear that she wasn’t welcome - good thing she didn’t plan on staying with them for very long. 

When Ransom came out, hands behind his back as he was taken to the police car, she felt like there was some good news to come out of this awful affair, but she still felt directionless - lost. She had a job, but she wasn’t making money being an assistant and she wasn’t willing to find somewhere that she would be making money. She didn’t realize her surroundings for a moment, nor did she feel someone beside her until they started speaking. 

Y/N turned her head up to face Benoit who had apparently been waiting for her. “You said you wanted to stay with me, didn’t you?” He questioned, she nodded, lowly and rather nervously. “I did -” “Then we should go now before… the mob gets to us.” He said, motioning to her angry and sort of violent family. Morris waving money to get Ransom out of prison, others yelling, glaring at Marta. 

Y/N nodded, following Benoit to his car before he abruptly stopped in front of her, causing Y/N to choke at the shock. “Why-” She began to scold before he cut her off, again, she was getting tired of people cutting off everything she said, truthfully. “You know, there is one other thing I figured out.” He led off, taking note of her family approaching. “What was that?” She questioned, feeling herself becoming slightly nervous that it may have been her little secret that she had been trying to keep since she met him. 

But as the man drew closer, and she was too afraid to step back in fear that the angrier members of her family would lunge at her. “You’ve been really good at hiding it from me, but I think you know.” He said, a bit of a satisfied smile covering his face when she didn’t deny his insinuation. “How’d you find out?” She questioned, her head moving up higher since Benoit had continued to move closer, but he brought his hand under her chin to tilt her head up, making it easier for her. “Why else would you be so apprehensive about accepting a place to stay?” He questioned, of course that’s what gave it away. “But, given the information, I suppose you wouldn’t mind if I did this?”

With that, Benoit moved his head down so he could meet Y/N halfway, although giving her a moment to make sure she was okay with what was happening. It was a sweet iss, but incredibly meaningful to both of them - and neither of them noticed the impending crowd behind them taking a moment to stop their yelling, realize what was happening, before rushing to stop it. As soon as Y/N felt a hand on her shoulder she didn’t turn back to check who it was, she just bolted towards the car, Benoit hurrying into the driver’s seat when he noticed her in the passenger seat. 

Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at seeing the Thombey’s so angry about everything that was happening, but their attention on Y/N was drawn short by Marta standing above them all on the balcony. “You could have waited to do that until later, couldn’t you.” She commented, her blood pumping full of adrenaline. “I could have, but that wouldn’t have upset them as much.” He commented. 

Y/N couldn’t help but laugh at the idea of that, especially since she couldn’t help but resent a majority of her family for disliking her because she didn’t betray her own morals for them. She didn’t know what the future would hold, but she knew that she was glad she wasn’t going through it alone.

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this the night I saw the movie which was... also the night it came out so - feels odd to finish it.


End file.
